Parents come in all packages

I always wait until something inspires me to post a new blog and sometimes  I worry that it won't happen in a timely manner. The great thing about this work though, is that it is constantly inspiring.

This morning I am excited by a short e-mail sent to me by the parent of one of our kindergarten students. At re-enrollment time, when parents are being asked to make another huge financial commitment, and a leap of faith in the face of free public kindergarten, this is a particularly poignant note.  It brought to me a fresh awareness of how we never know when people first join us, whether they will be the parents who see it, who get it, who feel it and come to love it, or the parents who walk though the doors and leave unchanged.  Either parent is fine, wonderful, valuable, and a joy to work with.  But sometimes in this exhausting job, filled with hours of hard work both in and out of the classroom, to hear the story of how a parent has come to see what her child has become under our care and her parenting  is a much needed medicine!

We spend our 30 - 40 hours a week in the classroom teaching to the individual and the group.  We keep our notes, our records, our thoughts, our ideas and our hopes for each and every child every day.  Then we clean, organize and manufacture the endless materials and activities, two to three a day, to keep the dream ongoing.  We meet and talk strategies, how to walk the line between accomplishment and growth, entertainment and fun.  We figure out how to modify ourselves, our expectations, and our environment to maximize everyone's well being.  We talk to parents, we seek out specialists, we come up with programs.  We keep up with the endless paperwork and documentation required to exist (well, kinda).  We shop, we build, we get sick, and we work.  We smile. No matter what.  Not because we want to fool people into thinking we are angels, but because the bottom line is, our families and  our kids deserve it.  We are asking them to trust us, to believe in what we do, even when the fruits of our labor aren't always immediately evident.

The truth is, the three year Montessori cycle is an enigma.  It is a mystery and miracle unto itself.  The third year reveals, finally, everything that has happened up to that point.  It is like a phoenix  rising out of ashes.  It really does happen that way.  We all see the little increments of capability over the first two years, the odd skill gained, the friends made, the independence won.  But is it worth thousands of dollars, couldn't this have happened anyway?  The answer is yes, if you look at each event individually.  And really, in the light of eternity, what do those skills even mean?

In the third year, these skills come together over the course of the winter to reveal the true gift. The child who looks at himself and sees a competent being. Who realizes his power over himself and others. Who finally gets that all the work he has done has meant freedom to build his true self.  Whether he is a reader, an artist, a builder, or a teacher. He relaxes into a confident, competent person who is now truly, a self taught learner.  It is great when the academics are impressive, but the real gift is the inner knowledge of how to feed oneself, to know how to build what is important, and to trust in that ability.  Academics ebb and flow, with time and experience, but who you are inside will always be there.

So we secretly watch and hope, and rejoice when we see the birth of this knowledge.  We hope that parents are aware enough to see it too. There are lawyers, doctors, housewives and cleaning ladies, builders, landscapers, musicians and  plumbers. There is no way of knowing which of these parents will be the ones who keep the faith, and listen to the inner music of their children's lives.  There is no way of knowing which children will be most affected by the experience, and so we don't  screen.  We take everyone.  The earth is peopled with all kinds, all deserving, all of value.  We all enter on a level playing field, and we all emerge changed for the better by the experiences we share here every year.  But to those who stay, and watch, and learn and support and SEE, thanks.

And, thanks for telling us what you saw, because it reinforces us, makes our lives legitimate.   Thank you Erica.